Post by Tha Nightmare 187 on Jan 23, 2011 23:31:54 GMT -5
After having a wonderful reunion with a familia-r face from days past, Tha Infamous One returns back to his humble abode. The night certainly went better than he was expecting it to go. His feet were still able to carry him back home with one foot right in front of the other. He hadn't had too much to drink he wouldn't remember his talk with Lilith. There were no fist fights with some loud mouth jackass looking to take his head off. No. Things were actually pretty good for once. It's been a pretty hectic week, but he was glad he actually had a night where he could sit down and relax. He found himself back at his apartment in New York City to sit down think over what had happened tonight. There were some pretty confusing feelings and thoughts running through his head. He was usually pretty sure of what was going on up there, but tonight...
Tonight was strange.
There was plenty of things he was going to have to think about tonight. He was going to have to figure out what he was going to do to Kenjiha at the match. He was going to have to figure out what was going on in his head and why this strange feeling was running through him when he was with Lilith. And he wondered what she meant when she said she needed him. He slipped his key into the lock on his door and proceeded to let himself into his apartment. 187 closed the door behind him and started to head for his kitchen. He headed over to where his refrigerator was, opened it, and retrieved a bottle of Hennessy from his own personal stash. Then he proceeded to head towards his living room area and flipped on a lamp. He stopped right in his tracks when he saw what was waiting for him when he got there. Another face he was all too familiar with...
Murda: "Hello, hello stranger."
A mirror image of himself was sitting right in his recliner with a glass of Hennessy in his hand. It was him, but it was also not him. It was his dark shadow. The evil that dwelled inside of the body of Adrian Taylor. The evil that people were familiar with when he went by that notorious name Tha Infamous 187. He was here now. In his apartment. And it seemed by that twisted little grin on his face, he had a few things he wanted to talk to him about too.
"What the Hell are you doing here?"
Murda: "Is that really any way to greet an old friend? Hmm?"
"No. It's not. How was your vacation? And what the Hell are you doing here?"
Murda: "Easy there, friendo. I've just come to check up on you. Ya know... It gets a little stuff up there inside your head. It gets especially stuffy when you've got a sea of emotions building up in you that you just don't know what to do with like some teenage high school girl."
"You know, you're partially to blame for all that."
Murda: "Me? Heh, heh, heh. What did I do?"
"You know very well what you've been doing."
He popped the top off of the Hennessy bottle in his hand and took a seat on a nearby couch. He took a quick swig from the bottle before resting it on the floor beside him. His eye fixated on his darker self in front of him who just sat there with that taunting grin on his face. Trying to pretend to be innocent when he knows damn well that he's constantly in his ear no matter where he goes. He couldn't even try to block out his voice with headphones if he wanted to. 187 had been trying to get back on a straight path with the least bit of complications, but apparently that was too much to ask for. He wondered what his dark shadow was up to this time.
Murda: "Hey. Is it really that bad that I'm just trying to help you? I'm just trying to push you in the right direction."
"Right direction? Is that what you call it? I'm sitting there, trying to reunite with an old friend. Meanwhile, you're throwing mental pictures in my brain and tormenting me with little whispers here and there. "
Murda: "Well, if you weren't living like such a lonely bastard and being a Goddamn hermit for the past year... I wouldn't feel the need to... You know... Liven up your social life. Make your personal life a little more exciting. You can't tell me that sitting in this damn apartment by yourself for who knows how many hours is all that healthy for you."
"And you really think Lilith is a smart idea?"
Murda: "Well, yeah. For one, she's someone you know personally. So, it's not like it'd be all that awkward to get to know here. For two, she seems to understand you. Like she said, we're all part of a dying breed here. She's just as damaged as you are. You two would be like two little peas in a pod. She's probably a wild one in the sack too. I don't really see any cons in this plan."
"Um, hello... What about Kenisha? What about the kid? Did you forget about them?"
Murda: "Um, yeah, hello... I've already told you about all that. She is much better off without you around fucking up her life. Did you forget she ended up getting shot because she was with you? And personally... I think the kid will be better off without you. Not to sound like a total dick or anything, but I don't really think you're father material. I actually think you not being in their lives is a positive thing."
He didn't want to admit it, but there was some truth in what he had just said right there. The danger level would be up significantly if he had wandered back into Kenisha's life. She did get hurt when she was with him. Because of him. Just like his younger brother. He died the last time he saw him. He didn't want to see another person he cared for to be killed because of him again. And what kind of father would he be? How could he raise a kid with the kind of life he leads? He could only imagine showing up to Career Day at school and having to explain what he did for a living. Sure. He could say he was a professional wrestler, but what about his night time activities? Yeah. Hi. I'm Adrian Taylor. And I kill people for a living and deal with the criminal underworld. Yeah. That would certainly blow over well with the school's faculty. How does he know whether or not he's passed anything on to the kid? Sometimes mental illness can be something that runs in a family. Maybe his dark shadow was right. Maybe it was time to let them go. If you truly love someone, you've got to be willing to let them go.
Murda: "Exactly. Let 'em go. They'll be better off without you."
"What?"
Murda: "You forgot that I can hear your thoughts, didn't you? You forget that because you know something, I know the same thing too."
"Oh. Yeah... Right."
Murda: "And another good thing about Lilith... She looks like she has her connections, just like we have ours. So, you wouldn't have to worry about her because she is who she is. Now, that's not to say you can't be there for her, but ya can feel good knowing that she can take care of herself. You won't have to worry about her because she's not some delicate flower who will crumble at the first sign of danger."
"But... Don't I have to do something for them? I mean..."
Murda: "Come on. You really think they're going to be in trouble? Did you forget who her brother is? Jayceon will have her covered. He's got enough security and money to take care of his baby sister. You don't think he's going to let her go poor and struggling? Plus, she can jump in the ring too and do her thing."
"But... I'm talking like... Emotional shit. I mean, you don't think that me not being there will be... I don't know... Wrong?"
Murda: "Wrong? Yes. For the better? Of course. I mean, it may seem wrong at first. However, in the long run, it'll be a much better life for them. Think about it... It's like when you put a kid up for adoption. You don't want to do it. It hurts, yeah. But you're giving the kid a better life you just can't provide."
He reached down and grabbed the bottle of Hennessy that was at his feet. He lifted the bottle up to his lips and took another swig from it. Could he really just cut off all ties with them? Kenisha would hate him. Jayceon would hate him. His child would hate him. There's no telling the kind of damage that this would do to all of them. But he did know his darker self had a point. Usually he didn't agree with a whole lot that came out of his mouth, but this kind of... made sense. He was scared. He was scared that if he did return back to his own family, it would put them in danger because he was who he was. He couldn't bare to see anymore bloodshed on his hands because of who he was. It put him in a tough spot.
"I don't know... I know she's probably got her heart set on someone else. Ya know...? I mean... We've known each other for years. What would make anything different now?"
Murda: "Um, because everyone else she ends up with always ends in heartache?"
"And what makes me any different?"
Murda: "You've got me with you and I make you the shit. That's what makes you different. I saw the look in her eyes tonight the same as you did. She's... curious. She knows there's something different about you. I could feel it. I can see that she could feel. And I know you can feel it, even without my own personal hand stirring the pot."
"I don't know..."
His dark shadow stood up from the recliner and brought the glass in his hand up to his lips. He downed what was left in his glass. 187 did the same thing with the bottle of Hennessy in his hand, but he did not drink down the entire bottle. Then his dark shadow set the glass down on the coffee table in front of his. He set his sights on his mirror image and shook his head. He couldn't believe that he was really having to push to give him something better. His dark shadow just said...
Murda: "Look. Sleep on it. Think about it. I mean... I don't know about you, but like I said... This shit where you just come back to this apartment every night... And it's just you here... All by yourself... All day. All night. Shit can't be healthy. Shit just can't be healthy for you. I'm just suggesting that you get out there and find someone who understands you. Someone you don't have to be fake around. Ya know? And personally... I think this Lilith chick knows the real you. She may not know me. She may not know about us. But she knows you... The real you... And she ain't scared of the real you. So... I'm just saying. Shit'll be less complicated for you if you listen to me. But hey, what do I know? I'm just you."
His dark shadow proceeded to start heading for the exit. He stopped beside 187 and placed a hand on top of his shoulder. Sleep. That's what he needed to do right now. He could feel his eyelids growing heavy. What... the... Hell...? He just needed to sleep. Think over what his dark shadow had said. Think it over. Make a decision on the whole situation later. But while Adrian is away... Perhaps it's time for Murda to go out and play...
Tonight was strange.
There was plenty of things he was going to have to think about tonight. He was going to have to figure out what he was going to do to Kenjiha at the match. He was going to have to figure out what was going on in his head and why this strange feeling was running through him when he was with Lilith. And he wondered what she meant when she said she needed him. He slipped his key into the lock on his door and proceeded to let himself into his apartment. 187 closed the door behind him and started to head for his kitchen. He headed over to where his refrigerator was, opened it, and retrieved a bottle of Hennessy from his own personal stash. Then he proceeded to head towards his living room area and flipped on a lamp. He stopped right in his tracks when he saw what was waiting for him when he got there. Another face he was all too familiar with...
Murda: "Hello, hello stranger."
A mirror image of himself was sitting right in his recliner with a glass of Hennessy in his hand. It was him, but it was also not him. It was his dark shadow. The evil that dwelled inside of the body of Adrian Taylor. The evil that people were familiar with when he went by that notorious name Tha Infamous 187. He was here now. In his apartment. And it seemed by that twisted little grin on his face, he had a few things he wanted to talk to him about too.
"What the Hell are you doing here?"
Murda: "Is that really any way to greet an old friend? Hmm?"
"No. It's not. How was your vacation? And what the Hell are you doing here?"
Murda: "Easy there, friendo. I've just come to check up on you. Ya know... It gets a little stuff up there inside your head. It gets especially stuffy when you've got a sea of emotions building up in you that you just don't know what to do with like some teenage high school girl."
"You know, you're partially to blame for all that."
Murda: "Me? Heh, heh, heh. What did I do?"
"You know very well what you've been doing."
He popped the top off of the Hennessy bottle in his hand and took a seat on a nearby couch. He took a quick swig from the bottle before resting it on the floor beside him. His eye fixated on his darker self in front of him who just sat there with that taunting grin on his face. Trying to pretend to be innocent when he knows damn well that he's constantly in his ear no matter where he goes. He couldn't even try to block out his voice with headphones if he wanted to. 187 had been trying to get back on a straight path with the least bit of complications, but apparently that was too much to ask for. He wondered what his dark shadow was up to this time.
Murda: "Hey. Is it really that bad that I'm just trying to help you? I'm just trying to push you in the right direction."
"Right direction? Is that what you call it? I'm sitting there, trying to reunite with an old friend. Meanwhile, you're throwing mental pictures in my brain and tormenting me with little whispers here and there. "
Murda: "Well, if you weren't living like such a lonely bastard and being a Goddamn hermit for the past year... I wouldn't feel the need to... You know... Liven up your social life. Make your personal life a little more exciting. You can't tell me that sitting in this damn apartment by yourself for who knows how many hours is all that healthy for you."
"And you really think Lilith is a smart idea?"
Murda: "Well, yeah. For one, she's someone you know personally. So, it's not like it'd be all that awkward to get to know here. For two, she seems to understand you. Like she said, we're all part of a dying breed here. She's just as damaged as you are. You two would be like two little peas in a pod. She's probably a wild one in the sack too. I don't really see any cons in this plan."
"Um, hello... What about Kenisha? What about the kid? Did you forget about them?"
Murda: "Um, yeah, hello... I've already told you about all that. She is much better off without you around fucking up her life. Did you forget she ended up getting shot because she was with you? And personally... I think the kid will be better off without you. Not to sound like a total dick or anything, but I don't really think you're father material. I actually think you not being in their lives is a positive thing."
He didn't want to admit it, but there was some truth in what he had just said right there. The danger level would be up significantly if he had wandered back into Kenisha's life. She did get hurt when she was with him. Because of him. Just like his younger brother. He died the last time he saw him. He didn't want to see another person he cared for to be killed because of him again. And what kind of father would he be? How could he raise a kid with the kind of life he leads? He could only imagine showing up to Career Day at school and having to explain what he did for a living. Sure. He could say he was a professional wrestler, but what about his night time activities? Yeah. Hi. I'm Adrian Taylor. And I kill people for a living and deal with the criminal underworld. Yeah. That would certainly blow over well with the school's faculty. How does he know whether or not he's passed anything on to the kid? Sometimes mental illness can be something that runs in a family. Maybe his dark shadow was right. Maybe it was time to let them go. If you truly love someone, you've got to be willing to let them go.
Murda: "Exactly. Let 'em go. They'll be better off without you."
"What?"
Murda: "You forgot that I can hear your thoughts, didn't you? You forget that because you know something, I know the same thing too."
"Oh. Yeah... Right."
Murda: "And another good thing about Lilith... She looks like she has her connections, just like we have ours. So, you wouldn't have to worry about her because she is who she is. Now, that's not to say you can't be there for her, but ya can feel good knowing that she can take care of herself. You won't have to worry about her because she's not some delicate flower who will crumble at the first sign of danger."
"But... Don't I have to do something for them? I mean..."
Murda: "Come on. You really think they're going to be in trouble? Did you forget who her brother is? Jayceon will have her covered. He's got enough security and money to take care of his baby sister. You don't think he's going to let her go poor and struggling? Plus, she can jump in the ring too and do her thing."
"But... I'm talking like... Emotional shit. I mean, you don't think that me not being there will be... I don't know... Wrong?"
Murda: "Wrong? Yes. For the better? Of course. I mean, it may seem wrong at first. However, in the long run, it'll be a much better life for them. Think about it... It's like when you put a kid up for adoption. You don't want to do it. It hurts, yeah. But you're giving the kid a better life you just can't provide."
He reached down and grabbed the bottle of Hennessy that was at his feet. He lifted the bottle up to his lips and took another swig from it. Could he really just cut off all ties with them? Kenisha would hate him. Jayceon would hate him. His child would hate him. There's no telling the kind of damage that this would do to all of them. But he did know his darker self had a point. Usually he didn't agree with a whole lot that came out of his mouth, but this kind of... made sense. He was scared. He was scared that if he did return back to his own family, it would put them in danger because he was who he was. He couldn't bare to see anymore bloodshed on his hands because of who he was. It put him in a tough spot.
"I don't know... I know she's probably got her heart set on someone else. Ya know...? I mean... We've known each other for years. What would make anything different now?"
Murda: "Um, because everyone else she ends up with always ends in heartache?"
"And what makes me any different?"
Murda: "You've got me with you and I make you the shit. That's what makes you different. I saw the look in her eyes tonight the same as you did. She's... curious. She knows there's something different about you. I could feel it. I can see that she could feel. And I know you can feel it, even without my own personal hand stirring the pot."
"I don't know..."
His dark shadow stood up from the recliner and brought the glass in his hand up to his lips. He downed what was left in his glass. 187 did the same thing with the bottle of Hennessy in his hand, but he did not drink down the entire bottle. Then his dark shadow set the glass down on the coffee table in front of his. He set his sights on his mirror image and shook his head. He couldn't believe that he was really having to push to give him something better. His dark shadow just said...
Murda: "Look. Sleep on it. Think about it. I mean... I don't know about you, but like I said... This shit where you just come back to this apartment every night... And it's just you here... All by yourself... All day. All night. Shit can't be healthy. Shit just can't be healthy for you. I'm just suggesting that you get out there and find someone who understands you. Someone you don't have to be fake around. Ya know? And personally... I think this Lilith chick knows the real you. She may not know me. She may not know about us. But she knows you... The real you... And she ain't scared of the real you. So... I'm just saying. Shit'll be less complicated for you if you listen to me. But hey, what do I know? I'm just you."
His dark shadow proceeded to start heading for the exit. He stopped beside 187 and placed a hand on top of his shoulder. Sleep. That's what he needed to do right now. He could feel his eyelids growing heavy. What... the... Hell...? He just needed to sleep. Think over what his dark shadow had said. Think it over. Make a decision on the whole situation later. But while Adrian is away... Perhaps it's time for Murda to go out and play...
To Be Continued...
