Post by punch on Aug 15, 2008 1:08:53 GMT -5
*The MGM Grand Hotel & Casino. One of the most famous in all of Las Vegas. Many big name celebrities have passed through it's halls, but chances are they never had to deal with someone like...
!!!JONNY PUNCH!!!
(Breakin' out the old skool font, bitches)
Punch bursts into the from door of the resort with a suit case in one hand, and a beer in the other.*
HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO LAS VEGAS!!! Where's all the black girls at?
*He's approached by a concierge.*
Uhm...sir. You...you can't drink alcoholic beverages in the hotel lobby.
Really?
Nnnnno...
What if I told you I was prince? From the Island of Madawan?
Madawan is in New Jersey. And I just so happen to be from Madawan.
Ya' don't say? You know a chick named Leona? Hot diggity damn that girl gave some good top. I tell ya' she could suck a golf ball through a garden hose.
My...mother's name is...Leona...
*A brief and rather uncomfortable pause...*
Oooooooooooooooooooooo...k. I'm...gonna go check in. I think you're gonna need this beer more then me...
*He hands the poor shmuck the beer and heads to the check in desk.*
Greetings Las Vegan, I think that's what they call you people, right? Oh well. I'm here to check in two to a suite that has a balcony, a stocked fridge and a BIG ass bath tub. Don't ask...
*The attendant looks at him funny.*
Two? You and who else?
Oh yea, I forgot. It's me and my Monkey.
*Punch opens up his bag and from out of it jumps...*
(Introducing Nutz The Chimp)
*The attendant was pretty much speechless.*
What? You ain't never seen a Monkey jump out of a suitcase?
*The attendant hurriedly set Punch up in a room. Just to make small talk he asks...*
W...what's his name?
Nutz.
Why call him Nutz?
*Nutz stops scratching his ass and hops off the table. He runs across the lobby to the Concierge still hold the beer and...
BANG!!!
...Dropkicks the poor bastard right the the sack. He crumbles to the floor crying like a bitch.*
You should see him do that to someone in a Tree Of Woe. WOE is he, *Heh heh heh*.
*Now...the attendant was scared shitless. He fearfully hands Punch his Keycard and says...*
R...room 34P...sir. Enjoy you...stay.
*Punch swipes the card from his hand with a smile.*
34P, as in PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRTAY!!! C'mon Nutz!!! It's time to unpack, get drunk, find me an Asian chick and gamble away my RIDICULOUSLY high XWA Paycheck.
*Punch closes his bag and heads for the elevators. Nutz follows behind him, but not before stopping near the desk and flipping the poor attendant the bird.
After this month, Las Vegas will never be the same...*
*The End*
!!!JONNY PUNCH!!!
(Breakin' out the old skool font, bitches)
Punch bursts into the from door of the resort with a suit case in one hand, and a beer in the other.*
HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO LAS VEGAS!!! Where's all the black girls at?
*He's approached by a concierge.*
Uhm...sir. You...you can't drink alcoholic beverages in the hotel lobby.
Really?
Nnnnno...
What if I told you I was prince? From the Island of Madawan?
Madawan is in New Jersey. And I just so happen to be from Madawan.
Ya' don't say? You know a chick named Leona? Hot diggity damn that girl gave some good top. I tell ya' she could suck a golf ball through a garden hose.
My...mother's name is...Leona...
*A brief and rather uncomfortable pause...*
Oooooooooooooooooooooo...k. I'm...gonna go check in. I think you're gonna need this beer more then me...
*He hands the poor shmuck the beer and heads to the check in desk.*
Greetings Las Vegan, I think that's what they call you people, right? Oh well. I'm here to check in two to a suite that has a balcony, a stocked fridge and a BIG ass bath tub. Don't ask...
*The attendant looks at him funny.*
Two? You and who else?
Oh yea, I forgot. It's me and my Monkey.
*Punch opens up his bag and from out of it jumps...*
(Introducing Nutz The Chimp)
*The attendant was pretty much speechless.*
What? You ain't never seen a Monkey jump out of a suitcase?
*The attendant hurriedly set Punch up in a room. Just to make small talk he asks...*
W...what's his name?
Nutz.
Why call him Nutz?
*Nutz stops scratching his ass and hops off the table. He runs across the lobby to the Concierge still hold the beer and...
BANG!!!
...Dropkicks the poor bastard right the the sack. He crumbles to the floor crying like a bitch.*
You should see him do that to someone in a Tree Of Woe. WOE is he, *Heh heh heh*.
*Now...the attendant was scared shitless. He fearfully hands Punch his Keycard and says...*
R...room 34P...sir. Enjoy you...stay.
*Punch swipes the card from his hand with a smile.*
34P, as in PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRTAY!!! C'mon Nutz!!! It's time to unpack, get drunk, find me an Asian chick and gamble away my RIDICULOUSLY high XWA Paycheck.
*Punch closes his bag and heads for the elevators. Nutz follows behind him, but not before stopping near the desk and flipping the poor attendant the bird.
After this month, Las Vegas will never be the same...*
*The End*