Rising Squats (o2a or o2 japanese prefered)

[emil]

Suddenly...

THE FOLLOWING ADVERT COULD DO FOR YOU WHAT IT HAS DONE FOR MILLIONS!

The fitness song hits the stadium as the fans boo, none other than XWA's fitness guru, Emil Edwards appears, carrying his trusty sportsbag filled with his many patentated weight-loss products, Emil always carrying his smug smile gets in the ring with a mic and adresses the japanese crowd

Emil laughs as the fans boo him

I thought that in Japan, the women were skinny, god, how wrong was I! Not even in the land of the Rising Sun, I can't skip seeing fat disgusting slobs like I used to see back in Uncle Sam Land! That you like Sumo doesn't mean you have to look like a Sumo wrestler!

Nevertheless if you can rise your crossed eyes from your mangas and listen to what I have to say, I have the salvation for all of you Sumo Sushis that are just sitting in the drafters feeling how your butt grows bigger. None other than my patentated, often immitated but never duplicated, Emil Edwards Protein Shake for the fat lad and for the slob gal. But of course I assume that people who was used to crash planes in Pearl Harbour without getting out of the plane, aren't good enough to apreciate my products!!!

the crowd boos

You boo me? YOU BOO ME?! The I sentence you to a life of hell in earth, plagued with diabetis, cardiovacular diseases and basically not being able to run faster than 0'5 übermiles! Try catchin' a Tengu when you run! Go back to eat your sushi! You Japanese people make me sick!

My patentated products don't deserve this loath you are giving theme! You don't know how much blood sweat and tears I have dropped in my products... Methaphorically of course!

Noodles, sushi, and those bean-filled cakes Doraemon ate won't give you my chiseled physique, nontheless you can buy my products yet, and pray in your temples and hope for a better looking body. Now japanese twerps, I am over, I have spoken. I've tried to help you but you don't want to be saved...

Shame on you japan, Shame on you!

Crowd boos as someone interrupts Emil

[n00b]

Whoa whoa whoa. Hang on a second here...

The voice of Ryen Thorne calls out as he walks through the entrance way onto the ramp with a mic

I may not be Japanese, but I damn sure did live here for a large portion of my life and career. You could say, I am Japanese though, because I have spent more time infront of these fans, performing in what they regard as a lifestyle of tradition. Then I have infront of American biggots such as yourself.

Shelling out dietary aides and preaching about your physique. What a crock. Any man, women or child could achieve the same body, same tone and same athleticism by eating right and working out for the minimal time for the day. It's about metabolism, not marketing strategy.

Ryen proceeds to walk around the stage as he speaks. Something he picked up from Americanized wrestling companies as an effective promo trait

So if you think you can insult these people, my people, my friends, my fans and the ones I respect with the utmost amount as near or as close to as family as humanly possible, then your insulting me. I don't take kindly to insults. They are the words Neanderthals, miscreants and ultimately, muscle heads like you fall by.

So I believe you have yourself a Japanese challenger, by life, not blood, though I've spilled so much here, you could say I've been infected with wrestling blood of the true legends of the sport. So what do you say, Emil, do you think you can do what nobody else has? Can you defeat me, can you survive me, can you back up your talk and ego diarrhea?

He wasn't the greatest at the americanized trash talk. Here in Japan it was better said with fists, chops, kicks and stiff moves, not cheap talk of winning.
He awaited the mans words of acknowledgment and/or acceptance

[emil]

Emil cracks up at this jerkass fanboy that just popped here

Seriously, is this what Japan has to offer me as a competition?! MWAHAHAHA!!!! Look I fight fat with all my heart, I try to make everything possible to make people feel good with their bodies, you boo me and then you send this... this...

Cross between a 70s gay movie and an emo to make me shut up?!?!?

HAHAHAHA!!!!

Emil takes out one of his protein bars and throws it at Ryan

Look twerp, there is something you jerks don't seem to know, there's freedom of expression, I could go right now to the emperor of japan and tell him that this country sucks, and he wouldn't be able to do me anything. And I don't give two cents if you were risen by a japanese family because your own family wasn't able to stand your purple ass. I say what I have to say and there's no way in hell you are gonna make me shut up boy.

Do you have a life insurance by the way? I don't want any responsabilites for crippling such a worthless, anorexic, little punk like you. Oh wait people he's gonna come back with one of his Dragonlance phrases such as "I've been infected with wrestling blood of the true legends of the sport"

Boy get this clear the only thing your skinny ass makes me guess you have been infected is with AIDS! I've spoken!!!!

Emil laughs arrogantly

[n00b]

I don't need to shut you up, I just need to beat you into a bloody puddle of flesh and bone. No shake or nutri-system can prevent that, or my elbows knocking your teeth into the back of your throat. Then maybe you'll choke on them and shut up with your American arrogance.

And what the fuck is an emo? Is that a distant cousin of the Emu? Seriously, you toss around stereotypes like they matter, or are supposed to hurt my feelings. Oh boo hoo hoo, whatever will I do now that this chalk drink gulping, fitness guru has called me a name? Oh I know, laugh at the fact he spends his time with fat men and women, trying to change them. Poor guy, I'd be roid-mad too if I couldn't get next to a hot chick and had to suffer with shamu and free willy 24/7.

He could care less about the promo now, he was just spouting off whatever worked at this point

Are you gonna talk more, or are you going to accept my challenge? Because you've bored me enough that your old video releases of sweatin to the oldies, are more entertaining then your mic skills, Mr Simmons!

He chuckles at the cheap gay workout joke as he awaits Emil to "man up" and accept the challenge

[emil]

Emil however laughs at this guy

Listen to me idiot, what challenge are you talking about? You think you stand a challenge for me? I mean look at my body and look at yours, pa-the-tic just pathetic, you look like the boyfriend love a U.S.A senator was looking for in the bathroom.

And besides if you don't know what an emo is, shame on you boy, HUGE shame on you, this just shows me that your body is actually a reflect of your mind, empty and weak.

Besides why are you doing whale jokes? Don't you know that japanese love whales, they love them so much that they hunt a lot of them, because it takes one entire whale for a japanese Sumo sushi boy. And boy they ain't Fudgie the Whales like the ones in america, they are real whales like Willy or Shamu, so please stop trying to be a smartass boy, it doesn't fit you at all.

Look at yourself, you are just so lame, not even with all my products and effort you could do something good for your body. However little idiot, as I said I don't want to be held responsable of injuring the crap out of an anorexic weiner like you. So before this match starts I'll be giving you 5 seconds to leave the arena, the time enough for me to drink one of my patentated shakes

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However when Emil turns he spits his product all over Ryen and he starts Pearl Harbouring him, the bell sounds and the match begins

END