The Opponentless Sumya. (o2 staff)

[sumya]

BOOM! HERE COMES THE BOOM!

Sumya's theme song hits all over the P.A as the fans start to boo. Nevertheless there are some holding banners that read: "Lights Out" or "Sumya Rules" Despite being a mean bitch Sumya is starting to get a fanbase.

Sumya appears soon walking down the ramp holding her Pearl Title proudly and she waves it to the fans' face, yelling them "Keep your hands off my title!" Sumya then hits the ring and starts doing what she does best: Speak

I sincerely love overcomming the odds, all you morons who jeered me and thought that the Indie Pop reject would stand a chance, you got reality smacked right in the face! It didn't even took me a Lights Out to finish that scarecrow off. That just means that I am better than Kimo The Eskimo in everything she does!

Kim if you are listening to me, you suck, you blow, you snort, and you are never gonna get a chance to my title again, you failed, you thwarted, you missed, you spoilt! And guess what's the best of it? That I can go on and on insulting you, your mom, your dad, even your pet dog and you can't do a damn thing about it!!!

Why? Because with the XWA Book in hand, you won't knock at my door for a long time. And I warned you Kim, you could have had that match someday in the 2008, but no, no, no, you decided to go forward and try your luck, well pumpkin your little leprechaun must been taking a big holidays because you are down and out!

After Sumya finishes ranting the fans start to boo her a lot. Sumya mocks them and waves the Pearl Title smiling.

Anyways that was part one of my speech, while I paused I gave the chance to all of you fat boys to get tacos, cokes, hamburgers... I know you'd need the whole Ritz to make your gut happy, but a few burgers can make your guts wait.

HEY YOU FAT BOY WHERE YOU THINK YOU ARE GOING? SIT DOWN!!!

Sumya was poiting to a poor overweight kid that was standing up while she spoke. The fans jeer Sumya's cruelty

Before I was so rudely interrupted by this lard ass. I said that it was time for part two of my speech. Well quoting a famous phrase from an AWFUL movie....

Gallas where's my competition?

That is the question me and everybody is asking. Competition, where can I find one? Under the stones? In Gallas' bed? In Ashley Diamond's bed?

Rethorical questions aren't they? Anyways. The point is that I am trying to look for competition. And Gallas you better lay off the Pate and the champagne, drag your ass here, because the woman that means ratings, the woman that means Lights Out, demands to know where her competition is.

Now you rednecks don't get me wrong I don't need Gallas for anything but putting a check in front of me.

I could have settled up a match, a battle royal, a gauntlet match, ANYTHING. However why should I bother to do so? Gallas would appear with all his pompousity and he would say "No 'Zumya ya' getz a handicap Lights Out match because you don't make decisions here"

And I am way smarter than him, I won't fall twice with the same stone, so Messieur Gallas voleuz make me the favour of comming out here très fast?

Or wait, didn't they hired a dumb blonde to take care of business? Sarah Warfield? Well where is she? Taking care of other business? Business that involve... Watching her belly button? Drinking lower-fat frozen milkshakes? Going shopping? carpet munching?
Come on! I want some quacker of the staff to tell me what I should do!!

Anyways if I am opponentless... Hey Luchastico come here

Sumya points at a taco seller.

What do you give me for 5 dollars?

Sumya gets given a taco, and she pays she starts eating it.

Or maybe you want me to take some holidays? Oh yeah, you can all admire my greatness fans, you don't need an opponent to know how good I am. You just need a bucket so you don't drool on the floor while you watch me with your faces wide open.

the fans boo loudly, they hate Sumya's guts but she's the Pearl Champ and there's nothing they can do about it.

[Sarah Warfield]

*A familiar guitar riff begins to play to many of the XWA's fans...one however that an equal amount of them probably didn't expect to hear as Monster Magnet's "Look To Your Orb For A Warning" begins to play through MSG. As the tune kicks into gear the fans come to their feet as one of the greats in this industry steps out onto the stage.*

BuZZ: Whoa...WHOA!!! It's...it's Sarah Warfield!!! The Golden Girl is in the building, Roachy! Holy...you don't think, YOU DON'T THINK!?

Roach: Honestly I don't know WHAT to think right now. Sarah Warfield has been one of the busiest and most successful female wrestlers in the entire world! She's wrestled in several leagues over the past few years and has been a champion in all of them, she's truly one of the pioneers of this sport, but...what is she doing here in XWA?

*With a mic in hand, she prepares to answer all those questions.*

Now, before you wet yourself there Sumya , I'll start off by saying no...I'm not here to challenge you for the Pearl Title tonight. Not tonight or any other night for that matter because I'm not here in XWA to wrestle...

*A slight bit of booing can be heard by the good people of New York.*

What I am here for is to address your dilemma though however. You see, I figured right here and now would be a good time to make myself visible not just to you Sumya, but to the entire Diamond Division of the XWA...as your brand spanking new boss!

BuZZ: Boss?

That's right, as of when I signed the dotted line, I am the official Commissioner of the XWA Diamond Division! I have been given the duty of leading the charge of the ladies who ARE leading the charge in sports entertainment here in North America, and as my first order of business, I'm going to help you find a challenger tonight for the XWA Pearl Championship. The question is, who could I possibly pick to face off against you tonight?

*She taps a finger onto her chin...*

Would you like to all see Sumya in a rematch maybe against say...Chloe Lockheart? Or perhaps Marisol Cardinale? So many fine athletes to choose from it's going to be a bit difficult...hmmm...I think I have it! This will be a match that I most certainly will enjoy seeing, and I know all of you here in MSG would too. How about we give another former Pearl Champion a chance to become a two-time Pearl Champion tonight here at X-Games? She fought her British bum off last week against Hayley Jonas, and she has been modest and honorable enough to have not yet exacted a rematch clause since she lost the title, so I figure why not reward her with another chance at holding the belt?

I think by now you realize that I'm talking about the XWA's FIRST Pearl Champion, a woman after my heart and the Diamond Division's resident "Submissionista" Cosette Grace! Wouldn't that be a great match tonight folks?

Roach: I certainly think so. The more grounded style of Grace's versus Sumya's aggressive style, that could have the makings of a bonafide classic!

*The fans agree with the idea as well, heard through their cheers.*

[sumya]

Sumya then stares at Sarah Warfield with scorn

You are the new boss? Well atleast it's a relief not to hear that French Poodle mispronouncing all time. But let me guess... Mrs. Warfield, why a women who claims to have wrestled EVERYWHERE in the world doesn't want a wrestling role in XWA?

Let me answer that hun, because I AM IN XWA! It would be humiliating to see The Golden Girl being put Lights Out! Oh yeah the legend of Sarah Warfield would be forever tainted while mine would be on rise!

the fans boo Sumya as she waves the belt in front of Sarah's face

Now about my opponent... Are you on your right mind? What has Cosette Grace done to deserve this? Putting us to sleep? Come on Sarah you gotta see Cosette has no place here, she's the most boring woman known to man!

Not even a horny toad would get next to her, nobody has the patience to listen to that whispering voice of her speaking... Also I recall she has done nothing but lose, lose and lose to Kimo The Eskimo and someone who loses to Kim Dumper is someone who can be put Lights Out instantly.

So many fine athletes you say? Don't make me laugh Sarah please. Marisol Cardinale? Duuuh that border jumper doesn't deserve anything but being deported to Cocaine land. Chlopop? I put her LIGHTS OUT PERIOD! Jessica Harty-Hart? That dumb blonde was the first to witness the birth of the Lights Out. Heather Fierhart, duh that slut puts me to sleep as much as Cosette does. Hayley Jonas? That is a man. Ashley Diamond? She's a lucky bitch who suddenly crosses me out of her list... She's scared.

And I could go on and on allnight but something must be done tonight.

Sumya then speaks right in front of the camera with a threatening glare in here eyes

Cosette Grace... You are the most boring woman to ever grace a ring, your parents must be rolling over their graves seeing such a disgrace in the ring like you. Your submission locks won't get ya cocks girl, and while you can say loud and clear that Kimo The Eskimo made you the "good" submissionist you claim to be. I can tell for sure that your try will result into an even more pathetic loss..

Because let's recall who did you defended the belt against? Hmmm. A Jobber and a Playmate. WOW! WOW! WOW! I call that competition Borette I really do.

Well Cosette appear here and when the fans cheer up we will all know whose "bananas" you blew to get cheers!

The fans boo Sumya like the bitch she is. Sumya smiles as she shouts "Cosette is Lights Out" while she waits for her opponent to appear.

[grace]

“Prisoner of Society” plays one more time for the XWA fans in Madison Square Garden as Bore…Cosette steps out onto the stage back in her smart black suit for the big show. She gives Sarah Warfield a polite nod before walking down the ramp eyes fixed on that oh so familiar Pearl Title.

BuZZ: Shh, do you hear it Roach, it’s the sound of thousands of eyelids all closing at once. Was it Borette Sumya called her? I’m writing that one down!

Roach: All kidding aside this is Cosette’s chance to put herself back in the spotlight with the title she really christened earlier this season.

Before facing her opponent she turns back to address Sarah.

I’m so glad you didn’t forget about little old me going into the biggest show of the year Miss Commissioner. A rematch for that title would be the perfect way to end the season and I plan to make this one to remember.

She gives her new boss a big smile then turns to look Sumya over. As she does her expression changes and you can read the lines of shame on her face.

But, I’m afraid I have a confession to make here tonight. Sumya, you might be right about me. I mean, some people in the past have accuse me of being, well… a little bit dull, bookish, uptight, even the “B” word. But I plan to change all that at X-Games.

She places her hand over her heart to swear the oath.

This is actually a little embarrassing, but I’ll just say it. I’ve always found you pretty exciting Sumya, so maybe if I were to step into the ring with you, at the most important show of the year and beat you for that title, well that would be life changing wouldn’t it? I’m just so glad you’re going to help me do it. It’ll be a perfect moment I think, no need to rely on anything Kim showed me, no need to “blow any bananas” just me standing in the middle of the ring with the title after you’ve tapped. Cosette Grace, being interesting all by herself.

I might cry just thinking about it.

She slides her glasses off to wipe her face for a second.

[sumya]

Sumya then mocks Cosette's words

"I've always found you pretty exciting Sumya" Wow girl, lay off the ass kissing maybe it worked with Kiss the slut and Hager the jobber, but with me, Mrs. Lights Out herself, this won't work you amateur. You won't soft me up.

Borette with no Grace, recognize it please, your competition sucked! And you lost the title to Kimo the Eskimo, the most annoying piece of indie pop lesbian trash I have ever had the honor to put Lights Out.

You can wax on, wax off your face all you want and going half-orgasmic with your imaginations Borette all you want, because all this people know that in the biggest show ever, I'll walk out Pearl Champ and you'll have to thank God if you are able to walk again, bitch.

Sumya then waves the title in front of Cosette's face

Read my lips Borette and I hope your facial expression changes... Lights Out, it's how all bitches that stand in my path will be no matter how boring, dull and predictable they are.

Sumya then rises her title high in the air

Sarah, better find some tough Diamonds because I think Borette won't make it... But don't worry she's so boring that when she dies, God will make her resurrect again so she can't bore heaven!

Sumya then asks the fans to chant: "Borette" however this thwarts when "SUMYA SUCKS!!!" is what is chanted

I knew y'all rednecks would misunderstand me!

Sumya then cockily stares at Cosette waiting for her final words.